There’s a great quote by Richard Bandler that “The reason people have problems is that they have too much time to think”
When we chose to spend all our time alone, all we have is our thoughts. All we have is time to ruminate about the past and project into the future. Research shows that those of us who live with someone else live longer than those of us who live alone
Humans aren’t meant to be on their own. We evolved in tribes and the need for human contact and connection is one of our primary needs.
It can be easy after a hard relationship to cut ourselves off. To take time to ourselves. However, there is an illusion that spending time to think makes everything better. Taking time to clear our head is one thing. But removing yourself from all human contact can only make matters worse.
It’s important to socialise, to get that sense of love, connection and contribution by helping and being around others.
Is there someone in your life that has withdrawn? Could you send them a message or a quick phone call to catch up? It would make more of an impact than you can imagine.
If it is you yourself that has withdrawn from society, start slow. Join a local meetup. Join a Facebook group with similar interests that you can contribute too. Start visiting a local coffee shop and chat to the servers (once lockdown is over!). Little steps to expand your social zone will make all the difference down the line.
If you need help managing your thoughts, reach out to me. Together we can work to clear out the unwanted emotions and bring you closer to a positive future.